No. 218 - How Do You Mourn Your Brothers Death?

You drink whiskey

And gin…

with limes

And vodka…

with ice

And wake up where you passed out

You punch walls

Until your hands bleed

Until the pain heals

Until you cannot feel

You cry

Your eyes scream

You HATE God

Weeks become months

Months become years

And you age

with thinly

veiled

rage

Music becomes your only friend

And only poets can be trusted

To the exclusion

of those who love you

Existence is dark

Your mind isn’t yours

And then a bird arrives

A gust of cool wind

A stranger smiles at you

expecting nothing in return

And you feel

Something other than hatred

Something other than fear

Something other than self-pity

You smell hydrangeas again

And honeysuckle

And pine needles

You read again

Poetry makes sense

Bach brings good tears

You lie down with acceptance

Not knowing it will take years

And you learn you will never heal

*Composed, Edited, and Published in Atlanta, GA